Things are different now. The same, but different. I still love the things I love. I still love to paint those things. And back when I was painting those things and talking about them there were other things I was painting that I wasn't talking about. And now I am talking about all of them. The before things and the other things and the new things because now, somehow, it's all the same thing.

Sometimes it's fun, the not knowing. But it is not fun when I am lying in bed at 4:30 in the morning with a knot in my belly. Sometimes I lie there and try to breathe away the knot. And sometimes I get out of bed and go to work, and the work makes the knot go away. Then my whole day is different. Things flow better. Maybe someday that knot will be gone. Some days it’s not there. But Paul Newman threw up before he went on stage for his entire life. So maybe not.